Rotten Temptation!

On reaching the place, he said to them,

“Pray that you will not fall into temptation.” – Luke 22:40

Oh is this a verse I needed to read today!  These sneaky weekends have so many memories/habits of treats, snacks, and indulgence.  I did okay for breakfast – great for lunch but that mid-afternoon to suppertime.  It was like my kitchen had sonar and was calling me home.  It was insane how often I found myself drifting to the kitchen.  I would try to trick myself – oh good I’ll grab water since I’m here. Oh I’ve been meaning to throw that away.  Oh I should scrub that counter or clean that dish.  Anything but grab the munchies.  I finally succumbed …to bean chips.  I know strange right?  I was eyeing the popcorn.  I tasted two kernels and dramatically switched to the newly bought black bean snack – 6 ingredients for 22 pieces at 130 calories.  Not quite popcorn, nor chips but felt victorious.  But then dinner time came and went and I didn’t eat afraid I would give into temptation.  I kept putting it off until I was starving and snappy because I was so hungry!  I jerked open the fridge – full but needs some cleaning out – popped open the freezer.  There in the corner of the door they beckoned – the pizza rolls.  Oh how I could eat a 1/3 or half a bag (or roughly 16 to 20 rolls in a sitting) with a big ol’ heap of ranch.  The thought of a quick comfort food tantalized my taste buds.  I even pulled them out of the freezer roughly 400 calories for 12.  I could eat 12 and be satisfied.  But I wouldn’t, I would feel awful.  I constantly tell myself I CAN eat anything! I just choose not to eat EVERYTHING!  I try to tell myself this or answer the curious people who ask this question because I don’t want to forbid myself.  I don’t want to act like I’m on a “diet” because this is a lifestyle change not a fad.  Will I ever eat pizza rolls again? Probably – but not in a rush, not because I didn’t feel I couldn’t make a choice, it will be planned.  And honestly? I couldn’t handle the guilt that I knew would rush to my thoughts and heart after eating that kind of dinner.  In four weeks I haven’t eaten pizza. (We came close with pizza soup suggested by a fellow RBL and it was delicious!) Our household lived on pizza – at least 2 – 3 meals a week (I am pretty sure I have had pizza at least five days in a week before) pre-RBL.  So when I eat pizza again it’s going to be the good stuff and planned and with some veggie counterbalance most likely a salad.  I eat a lot of salads.  They can offer a lot of variety with a lot of different flavors and if made carefully can be pretty low calorie – remember not all salads are the same! Some could easily double my pizza roll consumption 😉  So I didn’t eat the pizza rolls I was able to refocus.  I ended up with a couple of low carb wraps with slices of canadian bacon and cheese wedges – coming in at 312 calories which I upped with an apple and 1 tablespoon of peanut butter and just under a cup of blueberries.  Delicious!  Filling and without the overwhelming guilt I feared.  But please understand that wasn’t easy – it was challenging and although I am full now (there is an itsy bitsy part of me that wants to pull out those pizza rolls but nowhere as crazy as I felt a few hours earlier!)  And I love my pb and apple and the blueberries allowed me to feel like I was snacking on something like popcorn except they were so sweet.  A couple of weeks ago I probably would have found them tart as many sweet items as I chose to eat.  But nowawdays a big ol’ bowl of blueberries rivals candy or the snack like popcorn.

Rotten temptation – but pulling strength from the Word and my awesome Savior –

On reaching the place, he said to them,

“Pray that you will not fall into temptation.” – Luke 22:40.

I prayed and today with God’s help I did not fall into temptation.  Moment by moment we push forward.  Thank you for being part of the journey – encouragement, support, prayers, are felt and welcomed!  God’s Blessings to y’all and may we continue to meet each other on this HealthFULL (Feeling Unbelievable & Loving Life) Journey!

Categories: Suzy Sullivan

2 replies »

  1. Great job! Well written!! Sometimes I will but the info into My fitness pal and see what are lower calorie options for the same taste I am craving. WTG! Stay strong.

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