… but I’m not ready yet!

We’re at the end of our 12-week journey.  I didn’t participate nearly as much as I’d expected and hoped to.  But- it has made a difference.  Every run I went on and every workout I attended was more than I would have done if not for this program.  I’m more active in my daily life now than I was 12 weeks ago.  My diet is still very far from perfect, but I’ve caught myself in the last week about to grab a piece of Easter candy and put it back because there’s a weigh-in this week!

Speaking of the weigh-in… well, I didn’t accomplish much. At all. I mean, at least the number went down (a laughable amount).  You get out what you put in, I guess.

I’m not ready yet. I’m not ready for this to be done. The support and motivation were wonderful, and I didn’t realize how beneficial this was until close to the end.  I am extremely grateful for this opportunity.

It’s ridiculous that I’m not ready yet. I’ve known that this was a 12 week program from the start.  I’ve known the end date as long.  I’ve known that it’s not forever.  I should have taken advantage of more.
Reflecting on this, I pray that this isn’t how the end of life goes (woah, too deep).  I want to take advantage of all that is offered.  I don’t want to be leaving kicking and screaming (even though I know there’s something better!).

Change is hard. But I will be out there on race day, running more than I would have been without this program!

The Dog Ate My Homework

Life has gotten in the way.  That seems to be my go-to phrase during this 12-week period. I’ve always got an excuse. First it was shin splints, but I worked my way through those.  Then came exhaustion and-well- laziness.  We’ve spent a bunch of weekends visiting family out of town. Most recently, we’ve been struggling with sickness in my house.  I haven’t been getting much sleep because babies and toddlers don’t realize how awesome sleep is- especially when you’re sick!  Early last week, toddler had what we believe was an ear infection- but he had a really high fever and was out of commission for a while.  He finally started recovering, and my husband and I kept exchanging an unpleasant head cold.  Then the baby came down with croup.  I missed a Saturday because of a sick child, and was out of town the following two- which meant almost a month of no-shows.  This past Saturday I didn’t think I was going to make it yet again, because the baby had been coughing and wheezing all night, and we were told to take her in first thing.  Thankfully the visit didn’t last long, so I was able to briefly catch the end of our Saturday meet-up… but couldn’t count it as a workout for myself.  Any free time I’ve had in the last 2 weeks has gone to prepping for a lengthy application and trial process for an online job (a Dave job!  anyone familiar with that term?) instead of running.  But hey- yesterday I learned that I got the job.

So- in the last month, I’ve managed a few at home workouts, but can count on one hand the number of times I’ve run.  I’m embarrassed by this.

Life got in the way.  The home team trainer Doug called me out on this phrase… he said it’s the grown up version of the dog ate my homework.

So- with a whole 3.5 weeks left (gasp), let’s see if I can hit the reset button and get back on track!!  It’s not just getting my body back on track- it’s resetting my mind… and I think that’s so much more difficult!

FAT Tuesday

Ah, Mardi Gras.  Fat Tuesday. Shrove Tuesday. Pancake Day… whatever you call it, it’s delicious.

For Shrove Tuesday, I ate horribly.  I mean, I obviously need to work on my diet as it is, but I was making excuses for myself today.  Not exactly necessary anymore since we aren’t banned from eating eggs and meats etc for the next 46 days.  The chocolate chip pancakes and bacon were wonderful at church tonight though!

Tomorrow begins Lent.  I’ve always associated it with giving something up.  I remember over 20 years ago, the first thing I deliberately “gave up” was Nerds candy.  It was my favorite candy, and if I did well in school, I would get a box for a Friday treat.  I was soooooo ready for Easter to come, so I could have Nerds again, instead of whatever other candy I’d chosen that week.

I recently read something that summed up what took years for me to learn.  It’s not about giving something up. “Lent is about conversion, turning our lives more completely over to Christ and his way of life. That always involves giving up sin in some form. The goal is not just to abstain from sin for the duration of Lent but to root sin out of our lives forever. Conversion means leaving behind an old way of living and acting in order to embrace new life in Christ.” (from catholic.org, but I think it applies to all Christians… even protestants like me!)

I enjoy food. Probably too much. And I find comfort in it.  Stressed? Depressed? Angry? I self-medicate with food.  The more unhealthy, the better it helps bury it down. And, obviously, that’s not using it for its intended purpose.  I use it in excess. I use it for comfort. It’s turning me into a poor steward of what I’ve been given- my body.  I don’t have the energy or stamina to take care of my family like I should.  I’m trying to give up this habit for Lent, and find comfort in the ultimate Comforter. The only thing that will never let us down.

We had a great nutrition talk with Leslie Knox-  it’s the stuff you’ve heard at some point, but sometimes you just need the reminder and the interaction.  I really needed it!  Hopefully this knowledge and deliberate change carries on through Easter- and beyond.  Boy, am I thankful for Easter… and it’s not because I can eat Nerds again.  Time to start preparing, and getting my heart in the right place!

Hey! I’m still here!

Life is catching up to me.  This past week was tough.  As you may remember, I had two very young sick kids last weekend.  My toddler is just now getting back to normal.  He wasn’t sick over the week- he just… was difficult.  Difficult like he had a 74 minute meltdown Wednesday afternoon on top of everything (Yes, I know that’s not normal. We’re working with people.)

I was so sleep deprived early in the week, that the first morning I set my alarm for was Wednesday.  The alarm went off, and there was a flash- followed by a huge crash.  Ah, early morning thunder storms.  I sent my husband a text and said I wouldn’t be running- he agreed that was a good idea!

So- Thursday I ran the final run of Week 2… 5 days late.  I debated whether to do week 2 or 3, but decided after having taken so long “off”, I should go  with the plan.  I ran- and I didn’t hurt! I mean, it wasn’t easy… but I wasn’t limping in pain from shin splints like I had been.  It turns out that the time off actually helped me heal- and for that I’m thankful.  But- it made it much harder to get back into the swing of things because I’d been slack.

Saturday morning came, and I was still burnt out from the crazy week.  I decided I’d skip the group run because I was so beat.  Then I thought about it and realized I didn’t want to be more behind.  Two minutes after I should have left, I raced upstairs, threw on my big blue shirt, and rushed out the door to join the home team at the Y.  I’m glad I did- it was my first time running week 3, and it was tough!  I had to walk for a few seconds while I should have been running, but I’ll push through.

And here’s where it all works out amazingly well:  The team is repeating week 3… So I’m on track with everyone else!  Not looking forward to the alarm going off early tomorrow though…  but God-willing, I’ll be out trudging along dark and early!

Week 2 is done! (but not yet)

Week 2 has come to a close!  Yesterday the group got together to run the last Week 2 workout for C25K.  I was there- but barely.

My kids have been sick off and on all week.  It started with the 7mo having a fever around 102… it went down with one dose of meds, but she’s been a snotty coughing mess since.  My 2yo son woke up from a nap on Friday with a fever of 103- and neither slept well overnight.  I was up from 4-6am (after not nearly enough sleep) holding the sick boy, and finally got him back to sleep.  I got another hour or so of sleep when the time came to get up and get ready to meet up with everyone at the Y.  I was seriously considering not going- I was totally exhausted, and my son didn’t want to let me out of his sight.  I was planning to spend the morning cuddling him on the couch…

But then I decided I needed to go.  And if he wouldn’t let me go, I’d just take him.  So- I packed up the stroller and brought him along!  It was so much harder pushing the stroller, but we made it through around half of the workout… then he started to get fussy and yell “walk!”.  So- I let him walk.  He even decided to run a bit when he saw everyone else running… so we trotted along- with him holding his waffle the entire way.  It’s amazing how much better he felt with a bit of fresh air!  He felt better most of the day, but was up again in the middle of the night with a fever- so I’m still exhausted.  And still have to finish week 2.

Here’s to hoping everyone is well soon, and I can get back on track!

(and if you’re wondering, yes- I finally got new shoes.  and yes, my shins and feet still hurt!)

Self-sabotage.

It’s a bit early in this journey to be experiencing self-sabotage.

I know what I need to do, but I haven’t yet.  I want to do it right- and I’m sure I could have made the time at some point, but I didn’t. And now I hurt.

In this particular case, I need new shoes.  I have decent shoes, but I need to get better ones.  I know this.  Doug told the at-home team this- several times.  And I keep putting it off- there’s too much that needs to be done during those rare occasions when I get some free time!

But these shin splints– they’ve been around since run one… and I was told to try new shoes at run one.  Let’s face it- it still wasn’t high on my list of priorities, so I’ve been running in old shoes that used to fit my pre-pregnancy feet (and I have a 2-year old).

The first week was ok.  My legs hurt, but I was able to work through it.  Our second Saturday group run was a bit more painful, and yesterday (Sunday) I was in pain just going about my day. Once or twice my legs tried to give out on me, but I caught myself and I kept pushing through it.

I decided I would push through it again and run early this morning, doing day one of week two.  It definitely hurt- I went much slower than I had been going, logging a shorter distance and fewer steps in the same amount of time.  But- I’m stubborn, and I didn’t listen to my body (or coach and teammates).  Lesson learned.

By the cool down walk, my legs were wanting to give out on me as every single step sent excruciating pain from the arches of my feet through the inside of my shins.  I was hobbling as I walked back in my front door. (Ok- I was really hobbling from the very first 90 seconds of running, and by the time I walked in it was an all-out limp.) The kids were awake at that point, and as I was trying to stretch my legs out, I had a toddler screaming and trying to climb on me.

Thankfully OTC anti-inflammatory meds have helped a great deal with the pain, so I can function and take care of the kids (although I’m still hobbling a bit and the stairs are a bit daunting).

I’ll be going to a specialized store for some decent shoes before I am out running again.  Hopefully I’ll be back at it and able to push through later this week!

About that self-sabotage- we won’t even talk about all of the (delicious) unhealthy food I consumed while traveling this weekend!

Root, Root, Root for the Home Team

Greetings from the Home Team!

We got to take part in Thursday night’s kick-off, and around 36 hours later we were already back at the GHS family YMCA for our first work out- Week 1 Day 1 of Couch to 5k (which I’m sure you’ll see abbreviated as C25k)- and everyone survived!

I woke up before dawn yesterday (Monday) morning (not willingly- the baby decided she was hungry, and I decided it was a good time to get out of the house for a bit while I had someone who could watch the kids- I am not a morning person).  Walk/jogging in the brisk 30-degree woke me up much better than my usual cup of coffee.Which is almost always cold- because I have two very young kids constantly needing my attention.  Yesterday’s cup was different. It was hot. And fresh. And wonderful. You see, I returned before the kids woke up- and got to enjoy a quiet breakfast with my husband before he left for work. Something that almost never happens!

I’m a big app person.  They made my time yesterday much more pleasant!  If you have a smart phone, here’s what I’d recommend you do:
– Download the Couch to 5k app (FREE!)
– Download the HIS radio app (FREE!)
– Put on some earbuds, and run both while you’re out!
I was able to stream the morning crew as I exercised (and got to hear them talk about RBL as I was participating!) and was able to worship through the music played.  The C25k app would automatically break in and tell me when to walk and when to run. I didn’t have to check my screen at all!

As for today (Tuesday), I’m taking my rest day. I donated blood last night (because when my son was born, blood donations saved my life!), and was encouraged to wait 24 hours before strenuous activity.  You’ll be hearing more about my story soon… but right now, I need to go tend to a crying baby!