I’m truly sad… But happy as well.

I was really sad and heartbroken that I could not be there to do the 5k or even be there to support my teammates. It’s frustrating when you work hard and then can’t be there for the finale. My husband became extremely ill and he had been my focus this week. Though I didn’t get a finale weigh in and measure, I am happy that by my scales, I lost 20 lbs. I’ve had to pull out old jeans because mine have gotten too big! As excited as I am about that, I’m more excited about how much stronger my body has gotten. After two back surgeries, last year I could barely make it all the way around the grocery store without having to sit. Thanks to this opportunity from Rob’s big losers, HisRadio and the good Lord above, the length I can walk and the amount of time I can walk without sitting is so much better. I still struggle with pain everyday but the doctors said that will be so for the rest of my life. However… I choose to believe even that will get better with time as long as I continue to exercise and eat right. I’ve so enjoyed this journey and meeting everyone. I’m forever grateful for this opportunity and will continue to pray for each of you and the success of RBL’s in the future. God bless you all!!

Coming to the end of this journey makes me sad..

I can’t believe this journey is almost over. I’m really losing it… Not pounds, my mind. I have worked out 3-4 days a week every week except two , when I got the flu and when my mother was in the hospital. Looking back at my calendars, so many times I forgot to log my activtrax. I started out blogging like I was supposed to but lately have gotten slack. Not because it’s not important to me, but because I’m overwhelmed with so much right now that I pass out before doing it. Not making excuses… No room for excuses.

Everyone has life issues. I had planned this time around to kick butt.. and I have to an extent. I’ve lost weight but more than that, I can walk farther and longer than I’ve been able to since my back surgeries.

My stepson came with me today and we had competitions on the row machines, bikes, treadmills, ellipticals and stair machines. The most I’ve done the whole journey. It is so much more fun when you workout with someone and now regret not coming to more classes and group trainings. One thing I really really have to do is find another way to deal with stress. I have been stress eating for two weeks and though it’s not all junk food, there have been some bad choices. I’ve learned so much and definitely feel better than when I started. I just pray when all is over that I will keep on keeping on. Love my teammates, trainers and staff I have met and I can’t thank HisRadio and Rob’s big losers enough for blessing me with this opportunity. Good luck to those vying for the win. So proud of you all. #champions

If it ain’t one thing…

Since I began my RBL journey, I’ve been so excited and thankful at how much stronger I’ve gotten and my pain had lessened in my back some. Then about the last 4 days the pain has been worse in my back and then this evening I get a pain in my right side toward my naval. I’m hoping i just pulled something. But of course, I have my live video interview with HIS Radio 89.3 in the morning so now I’m really nervous. I’m just going to pray and believe when I wake up and get to the YMCA that I’m going to feel better than I ever have! Get behind me Satan in the name of Jesus!!! 😃

Eating late at night

I’ve been really good with my eating up to the last week. I’m still not eating junk food, but I’ve been under some stress and I’ve found myself not sleeping well and eating late at night and eating more than I have been. I don’t punish myself if I eat fruit and veggies but I’ve eaten things like cheese with crackers or raisin toast. I’ve also been eating more bread and had french fries a couple of times. I’ve never been a big bread eater or one to eat potatoes much so I’m not sure what’s going on with me but I don’t like it. I’m also not drinking the amount of water that I was and have gone back to drinking more coffee. I love love love coffee… But it dries you out and I can tell it in my skin and the scales. So please pray for me that I will get over this stress eating and get back to eating healthy. I have to find another way to channel stress than eating. I’m so mad at myself.

Men make me mad!

Why do men lose weight so much faster than women? I’m really not mad, I’m super proud of the guys in our group that are looking good! I’m just a teeny but jealous that it isn’t falling off that fast on me. However, I will take responsibility that I’m not drinking the amount of water that I was and I’ve eaten some things I wasn’t in the beginning like bread and rice. On the plus side, I am still eating a lot healthier than I was, I don’t eat garbage food anymore, and I’m getting stronger everyday. Today I jogged longer on the treadmill then ever before, and even though it’s still not long, it’s more than I was. I’ve increased my pace and incline as well as length of time since I’ve started and considering a year ago I couldn’t walk around the grocery store due to pain, I’m elated! So now to get back to cutting out the white stuff and get back to drinking more water and get some more weight off!!

Shirts are getting loose…

I love seeing my fellow RBL’s at the YMCA and see their shirts getting too big for them! I love that my own is getting too big. However, I’ve noticed that even though I’m doing more on the treadmill, I’ve been staying in the comfort zone. So it’s time to get uncomfortable and get busy. I’m ready to burn some serious weight in the next few weeks!!

Workout when you are stressed or angry..

Today everything was going wrong. The kids were fighting and whining. I dropped everything I touched. I don’t usually let things get to me, but I felt like I was going to explode so I got my workout clothes on and went to the YMCA. I put HIS Radio 89.3  on my phone, put in my earbuds and got busy. It was not only good for my body, but my mind and heart as well. By the time I left, i was calm and stress free.

First workout all week…

Due to caring for my sick granddaughter, today was my first day in the gym this week. I tried to get there yesterday but was too exhausted. Today I just knew it would again, be like starting over, but once I got in there and got started, I ended up with the best time on the treadmill yet! I did one whole hour, plus 20 minutes on the bike and my activtrax weights/workout. I was literal dead… But never felt more alive. The great news is I continued to eat good even though I couldn’t get to the gym so for that I’m proud. I’m so ready to get into high gear and get all the sickness behind us.

Really emotional today..

Do you ever have one of those days that nothing in particular has happened but you feel very emotional? Maybe it stemmed from my Bible study this morning that took me back to a painful time in my life that actually was the beginning of my binge eating for comfort. When I got to the gym, I headed straight for the treadmill, turned on HisRadio, put in my earbuds and took off. Between my emotional state and the worship music I was a mess. A couple of times I started to cry, wiped my eyes and turned up the speed. 30 minutes in, I had a surprise visit from our team leader, Allison Storm and she gave me some encouragement that meant a lot to me. I did a total of 45 minutes which is the most I’ve done yet. I try doing a little jogging but I can’t do it for long. Regardless, I’m so so thankful for the progress I’ve made. I went on to do my weights and was more focused and calm by then. When I left my legs were wobbly and I was tired but at the same time, it felt good. I prayed for this opportunity to get healthy but I had no idea I would have to face the demons that got me here. I love my Lord who knows what I need to face to get past the struggles. I no longer want to turn to food for comfort… I want to turn to him.

Down a pant size…

My back has been bothering me for about a week but I’ve expected it to an extent due to the increase in weights as well as an increase in the amount of activities I’m doing. My foot pain has also increased but neither is unbearable. Yesterday I put on a pair of jeans I haven’t fit in for a few years now! There’s nothing like that feeling of accomplishment. So today I go to do my workout and after my warm up and my activtrax, I decided on the treadmill for my cardio. I’m not going to lie… I wanted to stop after 15 minutes. Instead I prayed for strength, pushed up the pace, put on some good old Michael Jackson fast beats and jogged/walked fast for 40 minutes. The most I’ve done I the treadmill yet. I felt like I could have gone longer but my foot was really bothering me and I didn’t want to mess myself up. Plus I had hoped to make the group meeting tonight and didn’t want to overdo it. However, my husband is sick again and I didn’t feel comfortable leaving him alone. Now if the scales would show my progress like my clothes, I’d be even happier. But I’ll take it!! I really want this!